A quick..what's going on with me..

December 19,2008 I went in for gallbladder surgery and I almost did not make it out alive. The doctor went in a punctured my vena cava (which is the largest vein in the body) tore my peritoneum (covers the intestines)and bruised and kicked around my spleen. After he took out my gallbladder...which they do while you are sitting up on the surgery table..they laid me back and my abdomen began to fill with blood. I had internal bleeding and they could not see where it was coming from. So he opened me up and had to look for the bleed. It was in my vena cava and it was told to us that it had clotted off and the bleeding had stopped. I went in surgery with a hemoglobin of around 13...which in normal for a female..came out of surgery with a hemoglobin of 8. I did not know what had happen to me. I went in surgery around 11am and was supposed to be out of recovery and back to my room by 1pm. All I remember is having this terrible pain in my stomach..looking at the clock and it was 6pm or later and having a morphine pump for pain. Someone told me what had happened..but I wasn't getting it. I was so drugged. My friends told me that I was very swollen and looked awful. The whole weekend was a blur..I don't remember much at all...other than pain and thinking how am I going to swing being off of work for 6 weeks. Well Sunday I kept having the weird beating feeling in my head. It didn't hurt but it sounded like drums banging in my ears and I could feel it in my neck. My pulse was fast and I knew something was wrong. Then my skin started to turn yellow and very white and I had a ton of swelling in my back..legs...hips...butt..everywhere. I was swollen like a dead fish. Noni gave me a bath late that night..I finally laid down around 1am. I was pooped. Noni told the nurse that something was wrong with me before she left. I was sleeping good until 3am then the lab person came in and stuck me for the 20th time. I fell back to sleep..then at 3:25am my nurse and the lab person came back in and said that I had a hemoglobin of 6.1 and that means I don't have enough blood in my body to keep my organs or my heart going. That would explain why my heart was working so hard to pump. I called my husband, Erica and Noni. Everyone was there and I was scared to death. There are things I felt and things I said but I would rather not comment on that right now. I had a weird calm about me and I was not sure if I was going to live or die. It was not looking good at all. Everyone was upset..wanting answers and solutions. My husband was ready to beat the hell out of the doctor for taking everything so lightly. I was so weak I don't really remember alot of stuff. Next thing I know I am going to get a CT Scan to make sure I'm not bleeding internally and then I was to get 2 units of blood. I had no internal bleeding thank God! The day was scary and not something I would ever want to go through again. All I could think of was my son and how I needed to be strong for him..because he needs his mom and I need him. Alot of things became very clear to me after it was over with. Now I just have to sort all of it out. Not right now..I don't have the strength for it..but in time when I'm stronger I will.